The On-Song Unsung

For the first time in 19 days there is no World Cup football today. This gives us the perfect chance to catch our breath and reflect on the tournament gone by.

Some will find their stock has fallen – Rooney, Ribery and Ronaldo to name a few. Others, such as Messi, Villa and Robinho, have affirmed their positions at the game’s highest table. But what about the players who entered this tournament as relative unknowns and have shone on the world stage?

In celebration of these players, I announce my World Cup ‘Unsung XI’ - in a Maradona-inspired 3-4-3 formation:

Mark Paston, New Zealand: The Kiwis have been the World Cup’s surprise package – never having won a point at the finals before, they emerged unbeaten in this tournament. Paston form was massive in this achievement, making a series of world-class saves against Italy.

Diego Lugano, Uruguay: The Sky Blues’ skipper was a mainstay in a defence which did not concede a goal in the group stages. What price Lugano lifting the trophy on 11 June?

John Mensah, Ghana: With the jittery Richard Kingson in goal behind you, you have to excel, and he has done. Remarkably, his defensive partner is named Jonathan Mensah, leading me to believe that ‘Mensah’ must be the Ghanaian equivalent of ‘Smith’.

Antolin Alcaraz, Paraguay: The headline-writer’s dream. “Italy Escape From Alcaraz” declared The Times after Paraguay’s opening game. He’s pretty good too – Paraguay are into the quarter-finals and they’ve only conceded one goal. It’s largely due to The Rock at the back.

Michael Bradley, USA: Son of the national coach, but you’ll hear no claims of nepotism. No one has put in more effort at this tournament than Bradley – a genuine box-to-box midfielder who can score goals too, as Slovenia found to their cost.

Landon Donovan, USA: America’s biggest talent, ‘Landycakes’ scored three times during the World Cup. His strike against Slovenia was, for me, the tournament’s finest. Landon, you the man.

Vladimir Weiss, Slovakia: Direct, quick and tricky, Weiss has terrorised defenders at this tournament and outshone Slovakia’s biggest name, Marek Hamsik. Now he just needs to find a way to oust Adam Johnson from Man City’s side. 

Anthony Annan, Ghana: In size and technique he reminds you of Lassana Diarra; in his reluctance to leave the centre circle, there’s something of Jon Obi Mikel. Regardless of this, you can’t question the quality of his displays for Ghana.

Keisuke Honda, Japan: In Arsene Wenger’s words, Honda is “the player of the tournament so far”. Honda, ahem, ‘kick started’ Japan’s campaign with a goal against Cameroon and looks a born entertainer. And he can't half hit a free kick.

Asamoah Gyan, Ghana: Gyan has turned it on when it really matters with late winners against Serbia and the US. One more goal and his World Cup tally will be higher than his shirt number – the first time this has happened since 1954. 

Siphiwe Tshabalala, South Africa: He scored the opening goal of the World Cup, and it’s odds-on to win the goal of the tournament. He followed this with all-action displays against Uruguay and France, outshining Steven Pienaar and giving Bafana Bafana fans cause to blow their vuvuzelas proudly. 

Coach: Bob Bradley, USA.  During the entire tournament America only lead a team for two minutes, yet came close to earning a quarter-final spot. Bradley instilled a never-say-die attitude into his players, created a unified camp and also had a good eye for tactical changes. 

Crossed The Line - Dave Henson

Dave Henson has only gone and done it again.

You won't find a more comprehensive account of England's defeat to Germany anywhere. And this song is guaranteed to put a smile back on your face.

"I just can't comprehend that appalling display so

I'm blaming those guys from Montevideo."

Respect, Henson.

Enjoy!

Anyone For Tennis? No?

With all this talk of the World Cup it is easy to forget that there’s a tennis tournament going on in SW19 – the most famous of them all, Wimbledon.

I was lucky enough to go along on Monday, to catch Roger Federer escape from two sets down and Laura Robson make her Centre Court bow. The sun was shining, the courts were pristine and lush and the crowds were replete with beautiful women. No doubt about it, it was a lovely day.

Yet for the first time in Wimbledon’s history there was not a single Englishman in the draw. I wondered if my visit to the All England Club could shed some light on this.

My trip there brought to mind John Betjeman’s poem, ‘A Subaltern’s Love Song’:

Miss J. Hunter Dunn, Miss J. Hunter Dunn,
Furnish'd and burnish'd by Aldershot sun,
What strenuous singles we played after tea,
We in the tournament - you against me!

Tennis at the beginning of the twentieth century was a gentle pastime to be enjoyed before, as Betjeman did, you put on your fineries and attended the club dance. It was an elitist game for the upper middle classes. Has tennis changed all that much in Britain since these days? I would say not.

This is not to say that the upper-middle classes don’t make good sportsmen or somehow lack the determination to succeed at the highest level. No one could argue that, in the world of cricket, Andrew Strauss or Mike Brearley didn’t have sufficient mental strength to succeed at the highest level of their sport.

The problem is that tennis is only played by a limited number of people and, put simply, the bigger pool of players you have to choose from the more likely that you will develop world-class individuals. 

Wimbledon cements the elitist view of tennis. I was a member of a tennis club when I grew up which, similar to the All England Club, imposed a strict ‘All-White Clothing’ policy. I never liked it as it felt too regimented and did not allow me to express myself - I don’t believe it is a way of encouraging youngsters of playing the game. Roger Federer loves donning his all-white outfits when he comes to Wimbledon, but would he feel the same if he had to act in accordance of this rule for 52 weeks of the year?

Last year’s champions Federer and Serena Williams always speak fondly of the tournament – they love the quaintness and “very Englishness” of it but you feel they don’t revere British tennis. Due to the perception of the game in this country, Federer, as well as Novak Djokovic and Rafael Nadal could all have been lost to other sports if they were British.

The ATP Tour Finals were held at the O2 Centre last November and this was a step in the right direction with music blaring out between games and funky graphics giving the occasion a little razzmatazz. But more of this is needed to get tennis back on track in the U.K.

In my opinion tennis needs to be seriously rebranded in this country so that it is regarded as a game for everyone, and not just the highest echelons. Maybe then we would see an Englishman win Wimbledon. Otherwise the game will continue to be won by a foreigner, who, after collecting the trophy, will make his way back to a country where tennis is taken a lot more seriously.

A World Cup Highlight - 1998

I wish to share one of my favourite World Cup moments with you.

The national anthem is generally regarded as a formality, a pointless exercise to get through before the action kicks off. But not always...

On 23 June 1998 the Chileans faced Cameroon at Stade de la Beaujoire, Nantes. Ivan Zamorano was in the Chile side that day, a man so cool that, deprived of the no.9 shirt at Inter Milan, simply, and brilliantly, chose to play with 1 + 8 on his back instead.

He decided that if they were going to recite the national anthem they would do it properly, and rouse the side and fans alike. The Chilean talisman was responsible for one of the most memorable moments from World Cup 1998 - at once stirring and very, very funny.

Best of luck to Alexis Sanchez and Chile tomorrow. Let's see something to rival this before the match gets underway.

The Vuvuzela Song

Check out 'The Vuvluzela Song' by David Henson - I heard it on Radio 5 live this morning and thought it was very funny!

"I think I'm going to call Nelson Mandela

And get him to order me a vuvuzela"

Superb.

Battle of the World Cup Minnows: Slovakia vs New Zealand

Marek Hamsik: The obvious replacement if either of Jedward pursue solo careers.

The Mighty All Whites

Scrolling through the World Cup games before the tournament started I picked out New Zealand vs Slovakia as the least interesting in the finals. So I thought I’d watch it, in its entirety.

Sometimes the least hyped games turn out to be the best and I could find myself pleasantly surprised. Who would come out on top in the battle of the World Cup minnows?

The Slovakian team contains some players of renown – Stanislav Sestak scored six goals in World Cup qualifying and Marek Hamsik is coveted by some of Europe’s biggest clubs. But it was the Kiwis I was more interested in seeing.

That their side contained players who turned out for AFC Wimbledon, Worksop and Yeading in their time tells you all you need to know about the All Whites. And what is it with Kiwi sides and their colour-themed nicknames? Urban myth or otherwise, the New Zealand shuttlecock team are known as “the Black C**ks”. I daren’t try and verify it on Google.

As the national anthems struck up I dearly hoped this would be the only time when the sides weren’t on song. The first half hour didn’t fill me with confidence, however, and it was defined by shanked clearances, over hit free kicks and shots blasted high and wide.

As a consequence, my mind wandered away from the football and onto lookalikes. I had to double take when I saw Martin Skrtel, who I was convinced was Wentworth Miller from ‘Prison Break’, and New Zealand’s Simon Elliot is a dead-ringer for Art Garfunkel. Apparently he is penning a song about his search for England's no.21 in the Rainbow Nation: For Emile, Whenever I May Find Him.

Slovakia began to get a foothold in the game with Vladimir Weiss and Hamsik looking to have more quality than their opponents. Both were involved in a clever free-kick routine in the 43^rd minute with Mark Paston palming Hamsik’s shot over the bar.

The European team eventually opened the scoring through Robert Wittek with a strike which will certainly not feature in the ‘Goal of the Tournament’ competition. “A bread and butter goal” was BBC commentator Martin Keown’s accurate description.

At this point, the game entered a lull with few meaningful chances. Weiss was denied by a last-ditch tackle by Winston Reid after a decent move, and the Kiwi Shane Smeltz – who I’m sure had a tough time of things at school – missed a decent chance at the other end.

Then in the 93^rd minute – drama! The Slovakian defence, thinking they had the game won, switched off and Winston Reid nipped in and scored with a header. The Kiwis had secured a point they barely deserved, their first in World Cup history.

Was it drama enough to leave me pleasantly surprised as I had hoped? I would say "no". Like many a match at these finals it was a disappointment, with New Zealand looking like a limited side and Slovakia looking good, but not quite good enough to break down a well-drilled outfit.

Oh well, Chile play Honduras at the same time tomorrow.

A Word In Your Ear, Fabio

So we drew 1 – 1 against the USA. It’s not the end of the world. Our opponents were an experienced side, well organised by Bob Bradley, and currently lie fourteenth in the world rankings.

And it’s unrealistic for a team to play quality football throughout an international tournament. In 2008, the Dutch played scintillating football before coming unstuck at the quarter-final stage against an Arshavin-inspired Russia. A disappointing result – and ours wasn’t even a defeat – gives a coach an opportunity to reflect on the game and remedy what went wrong.

That said, the notion of Capello as an infallible being was dealt a severe blow on Saturday. If I had the opportunity to bend Fabio’s ear I would make the following five suggestions to get us back on track:

GET RID OF EMILE: Heskey probably outplayed Rooney on Saturday but England’s forward line ain’t big enough for the both of them. Wayne has evolved as a footballer over the last couple of years with Ferguson honing him into a predator supreme, which explains his record of 34 goals in 44 games this season. Compare his run of excellent headed goals with his pathetic headed effort in the second half and you see how important it is to give him the platform to do what he’s been doing all season for United.

DISPENSE WITH STEVE’N’FRANK: How many times do you try something before you admit it doesn’t work? It seemed the first thing Capello accepted when he took the position of England manager was that these two can’t play together. And yet for the biggest game of his reign he changes his mind.

Lampard, the man who orchestrated Chelsea’s remarkable end to the season was reduced to babysitting Steven Gerrard, for whom the term ‘headless chicken’ – albeit one who’s good at football – springs to mind.

PLAY GERRARD ON THE LEFT OF MIDFIELD: Ah, the infamous Left Midfield. A position no Englishman dare tread. And yet Ronaldinho, Zidane and Cristiano Ronaldo have all made a pretty good fist of it in recent years – so why not Gerrard? Perhaps the problem isn’t so much that Gerrard lacks the technique to play there, more that he doesn’t have the humility to give it a good go.

PLAY DAWSON: It may be that Capello’s World Cup defensive picks are his nadir as England manager. His decision to choose King has come back to haunt him; Ferdinand, clearly not 100% fit, was always going to be susceptible to another injury; and Carragher’s loss of pace was palpable against the USA.

The best defensive partnerships tend to follow the rule of one combative player combined with one who has pace – think Terry/Gallas, Hyppia/Henchoz, Toure/Campbell. Being the only player left with any pace to call upon Dawson could have the opportunity to stake a claim he never thought possible a few months ago.

GET RID OF 4-4-2: I would be interested to know how many sides in the World Cup are playing a Bore-4-2 system. I suspect very few, yet the English still do. It is an out-dated formation which asks far too much of your left and right midfield and often leaves your midfield vulnerable after your wide men have pushed forward.

A 4-5-1 / 4-3-3 offers both greater assurance in defence and would be far more effective going forward, with Rooney and Lampard benefiting in particular.

Look, I’m not entirely writing off England’s chances of winning the World Cup, and there were some useful performances at the weekend – Terry, Johnson, Cole, Lennon, for instance. It’s just a question of shifting the chess pieces around the board a little, and who knows what will happen.

So my chosen team to face Algeria next Friday would be as follows, in a 4-3-3 formation: James – Johnson, Terry, Dawson, Cole – Barry, Milner, Lampard – Gerrard, Rooney, Lennon.